How To: Approach Your Loved Ones About Pre-Planning

We understand that talking to your loved ones about pre-planning their memorials can be a delicate and difficult topic. It touches on deep emotions and the reality of death, but it can also bring clarity and a sense of ease to both you and your loved ones. We believe it’s important to approach this sensitive subject with love and respect. So, if you’re thinking about having a conversation about this topic soon, we have some helpful tips to help guide you.

Preparation

Before starting the discussion, it’s important to educate yourself on the process of pre-planning. Our team of consultants is always ready to help walk you through each step, ensuring you have all the information and support you need to make these informed decisions proactively. We always encourage you to ask any questions you may have to better understand and prepare you for the conversation ahead— no question is a bad one. We believe it’s important to have a solid understanding of the benefits, options, and necessary measures involved, allowing you to better explain the importance of memorial pre-planning and why it matters. Being well-informed will help you address any questions or concerns your loved ones might have and show that you’ve thought this through carefully.

Pre-Planning Conversations: Questions to Consider

One key aspect often overlooked is knowing what questions to ask during the pre-planning conversation. It’s important to talk through the budgets and the financial state of those who are a part of the planning process. Do they know about the potential costs involved? Do they have any financial concerns or expectations that everyone should be aware of? With that, it’s important to discuss matters and meanings behind their preferred location for services, burial, or cremation preferences and the legal documents they may need to prepare. Ask if they would like to include specific religious or cultural considerations in the service. Do they have a will or estate plan in place?  These questions help simplify the process while allowing your loved ones to be included in decisions directly impacting their final wishes and legacy.

Choose the Right Time & Place

Finding the right moment to discuss the topic of pre-planning can play a large role in how the conversation is carried out. Simple questions to consider when looking to make your loved ones feel included is to simply plan out a good time to talk. Is there a particular time of day that works best for you to discuss these matters? Where do you prefer to have this conversation? It can be helpful to have your loved ones feel that they have a say in how this topic is approached. We encourage you to choose a time when everyone is relaxed and not preoccupied with other issues or activities. It’s important to avoid situations of stress or when emotions may already be running high. A quiet, comfortable setting at home or during a calm family gathering can provide a warm, healthy environment for a heartfelt conversation to take place.

Approach With Sensitivity and Highlight the Benefits

Begin the conversation with a strong sense of empathy and sensibility. Recognize that it’s a difficult topic and express that this conversation stems from your love and concern for them. You can also emphasize the advantages of pre-planning, explaining how it can relieve emotional and financial burdens tied to a time of grief. Invite them to ask if they have any questions about the process to help provide a sense of ease during what can be a difficult conversation. Do they have anything specific they’ve thought about or already decided regarding your memorial arrangements that they’d like to discuss? No matter which direction the conversation goes, we encourage everyone to approach it with patience, and an open mind.

Respect Their Wishes

It’s important to ensure that you leave the conversation open, allowing your loved ones to feel comfortable to share their thoughts and feelings. It’s common to have fears, concerns, or specific wishes they want to express, so listen actively and without judgment. We always encourage everyone to explore how they envision their memorial service. What personal touches or specific requests would they like to include? You can also ask about their legacy wishes. Are there particular messages or sentiments they want to convey? These are simple, yet very special ways to make your loved ones feel included and cared for during a time that may seem difficult. 

Approaching your loved ones about pre-planning is a conversation rooted in respect, and sets the tone for proactive steps to ensure their final wishes are accepted and carried out. Our team here at Sunburst Memorials, understands the importance of these conversations and are here to provide support and guidance. If you feel that you’re ready to take the next steps, please don’t hesitate to reach out; our team is here to help guide you through this process.